~ bljr itu mmg challenging: my story ~

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal. it is d courage to continue that counts"

~ Winston Churchill ~

 

after i completed my bachelor's degree at IIUM, it didn't immediately cross my mind to continue with getting a Master's degree. dh abis bljr kn, pkir nk cr kerja jelah. tp i sort of jd cm org blank/blur (mmg la sedia asal blur pn)... nk kerja tp xtau nk kerja kt mna/nk kerja apa. sempat la submit resume kt company, tp submit resume pn bkn dgn sepenuh hati. sempat gk g interview kt 1 or 2 tmpt tp mmg x sepenuh hati pn g interview.

 

luckily it didn't took me longer to discover d Master of Library & Information Science (MLIS) program at IIUM. kebetulannye my ex-roommate was taking this program at that time, so she became my source of reference. i asked her everything that i needed to know, including "susah x buat masters?" and "ok ke buat MLIS ni?" (soalan2 standard utk org yg masih 50-50 & xtau nk pilih jln mna). i became d all-rounder - submitted my resume & went for interview dgn x sepenuh hati, sibuk called my friend who was d source of reference, applied for the MLIS program & finally got my offer letter to do MLIS d following semester - all these in 1 semester.

 

basically lps undergrad i sempat menganggur for 1 semester jgk la. MENGANGGUR mknanye xde duit/income. duit dlm savings xla sebyk mna pd ketika itu. tp ada hati nk buat masters. so, savings digunakan utk byr registration fees & what not. during my 1st semester, i realized yg perbelanjaan/cost of living meningkat akibat photocopy and printing. print assignments, photocopy journal articles, print journal articles yg online, photocopy notes, etc2... seriously, duit semakin menyusut. tetiba b4 d end of that 1st semester, i saw an advertisement posted on the notice board to apply for scholarship. when money became d issue, i pkir d only chance to get more money is by getting a scholarship. & d only way to get a scholarship is by studying hard and get perfect scores for all courses that i took in that 1st semester so that nx semester dh leh dpt scholarship.

 

d motivation to study hard & to score good marks pd awalnye came from d idea to get a scholarship. i did pretty well in that 1st semester, went to the administration office again to ask about d scholarship & was asked these questions - "what's d topic of your research? where's your research proposal?". i was like "huh, apa hal pulak dgn topik utk research bagai ni?". that was when i got to know that in order to get a scholarship, one must be a postgraduate student doing Master by research. adoiiii. sempat la rs down sekjp cz kpale dok pkir "duit duit, di mana kau duit". tp memandangkn my results in that 1st semester x menghampakan hati i, i guessed that d most logical thing to do is just to continue & study sehabis baik for d remaining courses. selebihnye kita serah pd Allah cz Dia yg mmberi rezki.

 

mmg btul Allah tu maha kaya & Dia bg kt kita mnda yg kita nk pd wktu yg kita xjgka. wpun i xdpt scholarship, i stil survived dgn duit yg mmg xde tnjk ciri2 nk meningkat dlm account. pandai2 la urus duit ms tu. & tetiba, i was offered utk kerja parttime jg resource centre at the faculty. i worked there with another friend. kerja parttime cnfirm2 la dpt duit =) suka. xde la sesak nafas sgt pkir duit nk byr itu ini.

 

tp bila duit dh xjd issue, mnda len lk yg jd issue... i was forced to become wiser in managing my time. kalo kelas pg, kna kerja ptg. kalo kelas ptg, kna kerja pg. so, sesak nafas pkir cmne nk divide masa utk wt assignments/g library/wt discussion/group project/bc articles/etc2 (tp, asal mlm je sibuk main Zuma smpi ntah kul brp... yg tu pndi la pulak i divide time, muahahaha). as a result of xbrp wise nk divide masa utk study & kerja, jd lah i seorg gadis yg sntiasa penuh dgn airmata cz xtahan dh idup x terurus. byk kali gk i nanges cz dh xlarat sgt nk study. susahnye. rs nk quit. i was already in my final semester & penuh dgn perasaan nk stop study bcz rs xmampu nk urus ms utk study & kerja =( giller btul ms tu. itu br kerja parttime.

 

however, i had good support system around me. lecturers, friends, family - they were my source of inspiration. lgpn, i sndiri yg decide to continue studying. dlm erti kata lain, i sndiri yg gatal nk smbg buat Master. kalo i quit ms dh nk habis, mmg la xde org len yg leh dipersalahkn kecuali i. so, i bertahan. gigih. truskn gk wpun byk nanges (syaiton mmg berusaha habis2an nk hasut supaya i quit). & finally i managed to complete d whole program in one and a half years.

 

to me, i don't think i'll b able to do well if i work & study at d same time. maka itu, i tabik spring kt sesiapa yg smbg study & kerja serentak (ex-officemate, anda dlm kategori ini, hehehe).